Today's conversation...

Girl: "Marque, you're so...different and...weird."

Me: (I shrug.)

Girl: "Like...what's wrong with you? "

Me: "Nothing's wrong...I just don't give a crap about 'fitting in.'  I ain't made for that."

Girl: "Yeah, but, like...you do realize people actually LIKE you, right?"

Me: "And?"

Girl (She shakes her head and rolls her eyes, lecturing me.): (Blah, blah, blah, fucking blah...)

Me (after maybe 5 minutes): "What? I'm sorry, you said something?"

Girl: "You weren't even listening?!"

Me: "My bad...I was thinking about how to approach the cover painting for this short story."

Girl (Her mouth drops open.): "Jesus!" (She storms off.)

LOL.

I thought I'd post this here, too, just in case someone misses it!

Good lord, you all have no idea how many people have been going apeshit in emails over such a simple, inconsequential thing!

For those new fans and also one girl in particular that sent me an email saying, "What's the deal? You're too cool and too talented to be a * * * * * * !", here's the "FROM THE AUTHOR" section on the "Creatures, Smells, and Magykal Spells" Amazon page, which MANY of you obviously haven't read yet! Sillies! :)

(You guys are not in grammar school any longer, LOL! Do your research before you ask silly questions...the information is out there!) Anyway, this is what you missed on the page...perhaps I'll post it in other places, too, just so that I can stop answering the question so freakin' often! You all have no idea how tiresome it is! :

"OH, MY GOD...HOW COULD HE REVEAL SUCH A PERSONAL DETAIL ABOUT HIMSELF?"

Sorry, guys, I'll not be ashamed of my book simple because it tells the truth. The bottom line is this (although it isn't one of the reasons I put in the "About Me" section...it's funny I didn't think of it) : SEX CREATES BABIES!

I'm too focused on my career to give my attention to anything else. Also, until we get to where we're going, the life and the financial status of us creative folk is too up-and-down.  There's no way I'll bring a child into this mess!

"YOU CAN'T THINK ABOUT THINGS LIKE THAT...JUST USE PROTECTION!"

Excuse me, but you all have no idea how many couples I know that used every kind of protection there is, but somehow still ended up pregnant! I don't care what anyone says. On the off-chance that I'm one of those guys with super sperm that eats through condoms and completely disregards birth control, I'll not be out in the world "laying around" as if I've got no sense!

It's funny how people are flipping out, taking my virginity more personal than me. You guys are only shocked and appalled by it because you actually know what I'm missing. But me, I can't miss something I've never had, so naturally I don't give a F**K. (Pun intended!)

_________________________________________________________________________________

And, voila, my explanation! Satisfied? Good...now calm down!

https://www.amazon.com/author/poisontongue

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/PoisonTongue

https://twitter.com/WriterArtNerd

https://twitter.com/Wrinklegus

http://www.facebook.com/marque.terrynamahr

http://wrinklegus.blogspot.com

wrinklegus@gmail.com

Book 2 is now in progress!

I had someone take my Playstation and hide it from me till the end of September. I'm about to try the Stephen King hardcore method just to see if it can be done. No less than 10 pages a day. I really want to see if it's possible for me to write a book in a month-and-a-half.

Books, books, book, ladies and gents! FINALLY!

"The cat is out the bag" now. There's no turning back for me! :) 

And another...

https://www.amazon.com/author/

poisontongue

The Works of Wrinklegus PoisonTongue

And, voila! My latest novel, ladies and gents!

http://www.amazon.com/Legend-Orchis-Five-Sisters-ebook/dp/B008W23PBO/ref=la_B008WB69TU_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1344727334&sr=1-1

The Legend of Orchis and the Five Sisters, Book One, by Wrinklegus PoisonTongue

The moment of truth is coming soon, guys!

Hopefully it will only be another day or two. The reason it's been taking so long is because I had to COMPLETELY reformat my stories for ebook versions (I didn't know I was going to have to go the self-publishing route, and all my work was formatted for "print" versions. Print and digital are two different things, I've learned!)

Anyway, it's about 1AM, and I'm hard at work, trying to get these books done for you guys. My next post here will contain links to the published books! Please forgive me for the wait, guys...things have been slightly difficult on my end. I appreciate your patience. Love you!

—PoisonTongue/Marque Terrynamahr Strickland

NEW PAINTING! (Cover-piece for the FREE BOOK I'm soon to give away!)

I have issues with the image quality on some, but that's ALWAYS, as it's impossible for a digital reproduction to match the quality of the original painting. I hope you guys like them! (Oh, I'll certainly be letting you all know when the book is up for download!)

I've got some things in the works, guys...

I'm about to set up a TUMBLR, and I also have a SMASHWORDS account now. I'll probably link all the sites together soon.

Yes, Wrinklegus PoisonTongue is my pen name. I've been writing under it for quite awhile now, but I've never told anyone, because I hadn't yet started putting my books out there. However, life has put me in a position that has forced me to do so. I have to figure out a way to pay for school, so here goes nothing...

BEAUTIFUL CHAOS (My review of a wonderful story!)

(Click on image to view in HTML format! The plain text review is on the bottom!)

Beautiful Chaos

Review by Marque Terrynamahr Strickland

Staying true to form, Margaret Stohl and Kami Garcia have delivered yet another marvelously entertaining story. Although still set in Gatlin, South Carolina, the environment never quite seems the same. With each book, Gatlin is enrichened with new locations that add even more mystery to this food-filled, ‘fire and brimstone’ county that we readers have so grown to love. My favourites this time around happen to be Macon’s study, Ethan’s pantry (or what lies beneath it), and the Bokor’s little shop of horrors. Marg and Kami are understatedly good at taking you places, whilst never really leaving Gatlin.

Although a well-crafted, well-paced story is typical for Kami and Marg, I feel that the most intriguing aspect of their recent project is the growth of the subordinate characters. They literally carried the story! Our adoration of Ethan and Lena is most unsurprising, as we’ve loved them since the very beginning of the series. But it is the excellent development of characters, like Amma, Liv, Ridley, Macon, Marian, the Linkubus, and John Breed that place this story in my ‘finest reads’ category. They were just too much fun! It was wonderful to get to know John Breed past the point of ‘dislike,’ which was my opinion of him in the second book. Here, he’s just awesome, and he gained all of my respect when he took control in a certain situation. And Ridley, my goodness...our precious Ridley! She has a moment that’s even better than a certain critical scene in the first book. I guarantee you all you’ve never seen her wreak so much havoc! I loved it. And there were certain scenes in this novel in which my heart nearly bled for Olivia–that’s how much I like that character! And though this would seem to be more than enough entertainment, we readers are still given the Sisters, who are funnier than ever, and an Incubus Link, who still has his former shortcomings (or charm, depending on your point of view) in the brain/personality department, but is also now a supernatural. He was perfect!

If I’m to complain about anything at all in this novel it would, once again, be the lack of vegetables in Ethan’s diet! C’mon, Kami, Marg...REALLY?! Amma claims to want to keep this boy from harm, yet everything she cooks is eventually going to kill him! What’s the deal? Give this boy some broccoli or something, please. In a series that is so filled with delectable-sounding food, still, you’d be hard pressed to find something green amidst any of it. Good grief, get it together, ladies! If Ethan keeps up with the diet he’s on, he’s going to have a gut by the time he’s twenty! I’m sure you don’t want your young female readers drooling over him any less than they already are.

After the cliffhanger the story ended with, I have to say I’m quite eager to see what Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl come up with for the tale’s conclusion. It will be interesting, to say the least. I’m of the opinion that Ethan will be more powerful in the next story, or at least more ‘special.’ And for those of you sillies worried about whether or not he’s actually _ _ _ _, calm down. Remember, without the protagonist you have no story! That’s not a spoiler, ladies and gentlemen, that’s COMMON SENSE.

In short, Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl cease to amaze me with their adept skill to entertain. Two thumbs way up for Beautiful Chaos!

(c) Marque Terrynamahr Strickland/2011

Common Sense: We Mourn His/Her Passing

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: - Knowing when to come in out of the rain; - Why the early bird gets the worm; … - Life isn’t always fair; - And maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies, don’t spend more than you can earn and adults, not children, are in charge. His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife Discretion, his daughter Responsibility, and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I’m A Victim.   Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, do nothing.

–Someone Brilliant (whoever he/she is)

Short story I'm about to submit to a contest....

(Click on image to view in HTML format! Plain text will be on the bottom!)

The Pie Thief

Each contestant was set to dig in.

They were all hungry and eager to win.

Pie eating for sport–a ridiculous waste.

Well-to-do folks, each one stuffing their face!

But one contestant was missing this winter.

This deprived man had no spare loot to enter.

Juggling daggers for tourists did not provide much.

Life for the rich! The poor shit out of luck!

Great prizes for winning–oodles of money.

A life supply worth, good to buy bread and honey.

But no sense in wishing...he was out of the game.

He’d end their damn contest, he swore on his name!

He snuck himself inside, along with the judges...

...then bled them backstage, even killed one on crutches!

He slit the throats of contestants, making onlookers suffer.

And, last, took the meat-pies, so he’d have food for supper!

–Marque Terrynamahr Strickland/2011

THE SUPERNATURAL: How I wish they'd reveal themselves!

I keep telling people...there's something going down!

http://youtu.be/RjGYSGbAEUM

And I NEVER thought I would agree with Farrakahn on ANYTHING, but...

http://youtu.be/DvIgbZmALFI

And another...

"Ghost Writer" :)

I was just sitting here reminiscing on my 'ghost writing' days. In my early years, I may have been the closet-nerd, but I was the one who had the words girls wanted to hear. So I always had these dudes come to me to write poems to their girlfriends or girls that they were crushing on. I remember this one girl, jumping up and down in the back of the classroom, reading something I'd written. LOL. I guess she liked that guy.

...but I've always wondered what happened after the girls realized that there was no way in hell those guys could have written those letters to them. The thought amuses me. I bet those dudes were in serious trouble!

I put my skills to use quite a few times in college as well. My boy Fernando used to be in love with this girl, Jessica...but let me shut up, because that's a LONG story!

This is why I am the way I am!

I've known this from the very beginning...even as a child!


How Bad Do You Want It from Greyskale Multimedia on Vimeo.

http://vimeo.com/27933991

Conan the Barbarian/2011 (My review)

(Click on image(s) to read the review in HTML format. The plain text review is on the bottom!)

Conan the Barbarian/2011

There’s not too much to say about this film besides the fact that, whilst not being very good, it’s not terrible either. It’s just mediocre...as we all should have expected it to be, for it is exceedingly difficult to recreate classics! I don’t know what’s wrong with directors, who pursue remake projects, for I’d be afraid to try if I were them! I automatically assume every director is a ‘movie buff’ and therefore should understand what a crime it is to meddle with people’s childhoods. The original Conan holds much nostalgia for me, as I saw it as a kindergartener (yeah, I know...how about my grandpa’s parenting skills, eh! Lol!), and therefore, right from the off, I had my misgivings about this project. Thankfully, it exceeded my expectations–not by much, but still. Hell, I look at it like this–at least it’s not as awful as that moist load of shit, known as “Ghost Rider!” Nor is it anywhere near being atrocious, like the Street Fighter: Chun Li movie was! (Those are what I like to consider my ‘comparison films’ whenever I see anything that is unoriginal and shouldn’t have been made in the first place. As long as a film escapes the previously mentioned category, it gets a pass from me.)

Right from the start this film has three HUGE disadvantages:

The first problem is that it is absolutely impossible to find a musician with the skills to match Basil Poledouris’ original score. Anyone who is even slightly knowledgeable about film knows that the theme to the original Conan film is one of the most timeless pieces of music to ever grace the screen. Its beauty is literally at the same level as that of Star Wars and the Indiana Jones films (no disrespect to the genius, John Williams). I’m not saying that they should have tried to recreate the theme for the new version, as it would not have sounded as good anyway. However, without it, can this really be a Conan film? It was so hard to get that Conan the Barbarian feel without it. I know that’s unfair, as it’s a Catch 22, but still...STRIKE ONE!

The next, and also biggest problem is that, no matter what actor you get to play the antagonist, you will never ever get anyone as good as James Earl Jones–the man who portrayed Darth Vader in the Star Wars films and also Thulsa Doom in the original Conan! Impossible. Not going to happen! STRIKE TWO.

The third critical issue is the fact that the story is so mediocre compared to Oliver Stone’s version for the original. It just can’t compete. I wish they had at least gone back to him and asked Mr. Stone to whip up something. After all, a story is the skeletal frame of a film, and if the beginning stages are weak, you’re setting up the entire film to be so. STRIKE THREE! And because of the less-than-stellar writing, naturally other aspects of the film were affected as well, such as the subordinate characters. They were so ineffective in this film...completely un-formidable! This is a drastic contrast to Subotai and Valeria (from the original film), who were so vicious that they nearly didn’t need Conan. I hate for any character in a story to be pointless. Ela-Shan, Conan’s sidekick in this new version, might as well have not even been in the film, he was so poorly written! He had absolutely nothing to do except tell bad jokes and be corny. There is limited space for humor in a Conan story, and the fact that the screenwriters didn’t understand this should tell you they were only on board for the money and were not true fans of the original. They wrote without respect to the character or the story. Oh well.

In all, just like with all remakes, I think they should have thought better than to make this movie. The addition of special effects, better cinematography, and a bigger budget still couldn’t yield results that measured anywhere near our beloved original.  However, even with all of the aforementioned flaws, I assure you all this is not a terrible film...just not great. It’s a mildly entertaining piece of cinema that just happens to be entirely forgettable, that’s all. It’s a solid C/C– film.

(c) Marque Terrynamahr Strickland/2011